Hear Me Bark

Attack of the Standard Poodles

The humans and I drove to Morgan Territory Regional Preserve yesterday for our monthly Poodles-at-Play hike. Despite the rain, we hiked through slippery mud for 3.5 miles. Along the way, I ran across hills with my pals, stopped to play at a small pond, and got chased down and attacked like a gazelle being hunted by a mountain lion. Yes, you heard correctly; I was attacked.

The brother and sister pair, Tommy and Sally, came out of nowhere and started chasing me. At first, it was all in good fun, but when I signaled that I was tired of playing, they ran me down and started nipping and pulling hair and ears. Because it was such a terrifying experience, I shrieked in horror and whimpered pitifully as I tried to escape. Seeing Tall and Short rushing toward me, I hightailed it to where they were. Tall grabbed me on both sides of my body and started getting me away from Tommy and Sally, who were being pulled away by their humans. Short squatted down and I ran over to her, tail tucked and whimpering. I have never heard the sound that was escaping my mouth and hope to never hear it again.

After making sure I was physically okay, Tall and Short didn't make a big deal over the situation and encouraged me to run and play, which I did within a couple of minutes. Thank god for my huge ego and confident disposition. I was running around like normal before I knew it. I know Tommy and Sally just got carried away and I plan on remaining their friend. However, next time they decide to attack, I'm going to kick their ass. I'm pretty sure Tall and Short would have my back.

Despite that incident, the hike was a lot of fun. Also, I'm pleased to report that I came home tick free. Was it the concoction Tall mixed up or just luck? As long as I didn't pick up any of those blood suckers along the way, I don't really care if it was the repellent or luck.

Hollywoof: Fame for Dogs

This weekend, the humans and I drove to San Francisco to attend Hollywoof where we screened the world premier of "Sniff," a serious documentary depicting two British concierges of a high-end dog hotel collaborating on a documentary about dogs. The film got off to a slow start, but it transformed into a fun yet moving piece before my very eyes. I think I even caught Tall shedding a tear or two during certain parts.

A sequel to last year's sold-out fundraiser extravaganza, Hollywoof Part 2 is (apparently) the only event where humans can watch the films with their canine pals. Once we arrived, I made my grand entrance by walking down the green carpet.

In addition to kicking back with the humans to watch the movie, I met dogs of all shapes and sizes, sampled delicious food and treats, and mingled with the directors. I also received a bag of swag, which containted some pretty awesome samples. The Tea Tree Treatment Shampoo (for fleas, ticks, and hot spots) will come in particularly handy, but more about that later.

It was an awesome night filled with great fun. Plus, besides some minor barking here and there, I behaved myself as well as any Hollywood starlet would. For more fun-filled photos, visit Hear Me Bark's Facebook fan page.

Not-So-Terrible Two

Today is my second birthday and I'll say turning two years old is excellent. Tall Human, with Short Human's help, made me an awesome birthday cake.

 

As soon as I took the first bite, there was no turning back.

 

Seeing me licking fervently, unable to really get my teeth around the thing, Tall broke a little part for me and the game was on.

 

I kept biting and nibbling until I did some serious damage and then the humans, fearing too much would make me sick, took the cake away.

 

After I had my cake, the humans gave me a really cool peppermint disc toy, which I also loved. It smells really good and rolls great.

 

I'm also heading to the dog park this morning before we pack up our earthly possessions and move them to Oakland. So, all in all, this has been a pretty awesome birthday. I can't wait for next year!

P.S. I'll have Tall Human share the cake recipe later next week. It was seriously yummy!

Dixie's Holiday Wishes

Dixie the Dog wishes you . . . 

happy holidays and New Year too!

Play plenty of fetch,

swine flu do not catch, 

and give oodles of love to your spoo!

 

My Birthday Week

Another year has passed and I'll be turning two years old on Saturday. Frankly, I can't believe I've lived this long; my humans have threatened to kill me more times than I can count.

The first of my 2009 birthday wishes arrived this week. First, I received a card from PetSmart, which included a coupon for a free toy or treat (max. $4). I was extremely excited about this until we got to the store and I realized how hard it was to find something safe and fun for under $4. What a bust. I ended up cashing in my coupon to get my guinea pig sisters some nibble rings to replenish their dwindling supply.

Next, I received a card from my pet insurance company, VPI. The gesture was nice, but I would have preferred a card with a standard poodle on it. What about a pug screams "happy birthday?"

 I've also heard hushed mumblings about a cake, peppermint, and a package from Audrey and Trevor. I'm not sure what all this is about, but I'm guessing I'll find out soon enough. I hope it's something good —or at least better than the pug birthday card. 

"I'm just naturally stunning."

 

Personally, I think this is one of the most brilliant advertisements I've ever seen. The humans concur. The only way it could be better is to switch the white poodle for a black one. However, I do realize that we don't always photograph well.

Oh, and I will be watching the dog show on Feb. 6 so I can bark at all the pretties.

Ho, Ho, Horrific

The humans got the bright idea to commemorate the holiday season by taking me to visit the pudgy, bearded man called Santa Claus. I was leery, of course, about sitting on the lap of a man who dresses up each year to impress children, but what choice did I have?

We arrived at Santa's location and found many other dogs waiting their time to be judged "naughty" or "nice." (I think we all know which category I fall in.) I actually was too preoccupied with the other dogs to notice Santa, who was sitting completely still — like a deadly ninja— in the corner. When it was my turn, Santa reached out for me. Startled, I barked my head off and dug in so no one could move me. My barking set off a chain reaction of barks and growls among the other dogs. Two jittery whippets were closest to us and they turned on me like rabid squirrels.

Embarrassed and unwilling to leave without a photo of me and Ninja Santa, Tall picked me up and held me on her lap while she sat beside Santa, who apparently was clutching her too tightly. I never took my eyes off him, but did sit still long enough for the photographer to get her precious photo.

 

Things I'm Thankful For

Although we should be grateful for everything we have throughout the year, Thanksgiving is the perfect time to reflect on things we are thankful for. In the spirit of the holiday, I'd like to share with you the top 10 things for which I'm most thankful.

10. The bit of turkey Tall Human shared with me.
9. Clean water on which to engorge myself.
8. Raw bones and good grub.
7. Wag
6. The dog park.
5. Being a standard poodle.
4. My brother, Lago; my sister, Faith; my confidant, Charly; and my cousins, Audrey and Trevor.
3. My guinea pig sisters, Hedwig and Hazel.
2. My wonderful (and crazy) humans.
1. Fetch.

I hope each and every one of you have a safe and special Thanksgiving! There are indeed many things for us to be thankful for.

Taking Over Second Saturday Art Walk

On the second Saturday of each month, crowds of people descend upon Midtown Sacramento for an art walk that traverses many city blocks. After living in Sacramento for 17 months, the humans have managed to miss the Second Saturday festivities every month. That is, until last weekend. Not only did the humans enjoy a brisk artsy-fartsy walk around Midtown, but they also let me tag along. I even joined them in a large gallery to observe lots of paintings, etc.

I don't want to come across as conceited (or maybe I do), but I pretty much stole the show. Perhaps this makes me art. It seemed like children and adults alike saw me and called out "poodle" at almost every turn. I bet I heard it at least 20 times. Do kids shout out "lab" when they see one lumber by? I don't think so. My friend, Otis, also drew quite a few glances.

At one point, two scene kids passed by. One of them said, "That's a standard poodle." The other one replied, "Sic." Yes, people, standard poodles are making a comeback. I also took time to shake hands with two little girls who proceeded to wear it out; I can only tolerate so much before losing interest.

Overall, it was a fun evening. I enjoyed my time in the limelight and am glad we finally got out to see what Second Saturday was all about.

Batty for Halloween

Happy "Howl-o-ween" everyone! I hope your day will be filled with both tricks and treats. I celebrated early by attending Wag Hotel's "spooktacular day of play" yesterday. And I was not disappointed.

Costumes were encouraged, so I felt obligated to wear one. I went as "batty spoo" or "boodle," whichever you prefer. I was pleased with my fairly non-restrictive costume and got lots of admiration from the Wag humans.

I played my batty little heart out all day, but was, according to my report card, a little rough at times. It was hard not to get worked up over the festivities.

One of the best parts of the day was getting my photo taken with Miss Patty, one of my favorite humans of all time. She dressed up like a dog (probably because she's around us so much).

I also was excited to get a cool treat bag filled with yummy snacks and a 30 percent off retail coupon. I shall make the humans by me something fabulous.

After so much spooky fun yesterday, I'll likely rest a lot today so the humans can enjoy their Halloween. I hope all of you have a fun, safe holiday!