Naughty Is the New Nice

What I am about to tell you is a true story. If you are against cruelty to humans, you should probably stop reading here.

Yesterday, I heard Tall tell Short: "This has been one of the hardest mornings I've had in a long time and it's all because of Dixie." I've been in a very mischievous mood lately. I blame it on the rain. In fact, that's how yesterday got off to such a bad start.

Tall had the day off and decided to take me to the Alameda Dog Park since the rain had kept me from getting a lot of outdoor exercise during the week. Obviously, I was excited. As we walked up to the gate, we both saw several miniature lakes and I was afraid that she'd deny me my beloved fetch time, but she sucked it up and we went inside.

In addition to all the standing water and a steady rain, there were multiple piles of poop, obnoxious dog owners, and several dogs who kept stealing my ball. This wasn't shaping up to be the best dog park trip. However, we played for a while and Tall kept chasing down the dogs who stole my ball. Apparently, their owners thought it was cute; Tall was not amused. And Tall, like me, was soaked by the time we left.

As soon as we got home, Tall put me in the tub for a bath. As usual, I was pretty good until after my bath when she brought out the hair dryer. I wiggled all around and made it hard for her to dry me and after about five minutes of trying, Tall got frustrated and went out to get the grooming table. I was not happy. However, I stopped putting up too much of a fight because I was famished -- it was 10:30 and I still hadn't eaten breakfast.

After Tall fed me, all hell broke loose. I thought it would be really fun to rip around the house barking like I never had. If the neighbors were home, I'm sure we'll receive a reprimand from the apartment management. Like a fool, Tall kept trying to grab me so I'd stop barking, but I alluded capture by running into my crate. Furious, Tall slammed the crate door, which immediately bounced open, and  stormed away. I thought this was a fabulous game, so I tore out of my crate and chased Tall into the living room where she sought refuge, jumping, poking, and nibbling her the entire time. Tall finally made it to the living room, but she flopped down on the couch and cried a little. Still thinking this was part of the game, I continued to bark, jump, and poke. I now realize that it was not a game.

Tall finally got up, went to the kitchen, got a treat, and escorted me -- by the collar -- to my crate. I proceeded to sleep off my craziness for the next two hours. As I slept, Tall and Short began devising a behavior modification plan to "show me who's boss." I can hardly wait.

Comments

[Trevor]

Oh Dixie, I'm definitely the boss here and you should be too!

[Dixie]

Ar you as naughty as I am, Trevor? I know Audrey isn't.